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Custody and Visitation Dos and Don'ts

When you are faced with child custody and visitation issues, an attorney who has regularly advised and represented clients in family law matters can help you to achieve a cost-effective and timely resolution. To learn more about our legal services, contact our firm to schedule a consultation and case evaluation.

Will Child Custody Be Part of Your Divorce? Call a Lawyer Today.

Child custody issues are often the most complicated part of a divorce. Nobody wants to drag a child through the court process, but finding a resolution to tough questions can bring settlement mediation to a grinding halt.

At the law offices of Jonathan D. Katz, I have been helping clients resolve their complex child custody and visitation concerns for more than 25 years. I invite you to learn more about child custody laws on this page.

Contact my offices in New Paltz, New York, to arrange an initial consultation to discuss your specific concerns.

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As an experienced New York family law attorney, Jonathan D. Katz has helped resolve many types of child custody issues in family law courts throughout the Hudson Valley, the Catskills and the New York City region.

The law offices of Jonathan D. Katz is ready to handle complex and unusual child custody cases involving parents in international locations, including Germany and other countries in Europe such as Italy, England or Poland, as well as in Hong Kong and other locations in China.

Custody and Visitation Dos and Don'ts

One thing divorce does not change is your being a parent. Whether you develop a traditional visitation schedule or a flexible co-parenting plan, whether the arrangement is temporary or permanent, you can help make the time you spend with your children happy and productive. When questions regarding custody and visitation arise, an experienced family law attorney from Jonathan D. Katz in New Paltz, New York, is the ideal source for competent counsel.

The following are some hints on making the most of your time with your children — and making the transitions easier on them.

DO:

Balance flexibility and promptness. Try to be on time when your children are being picked up or returned. It lets your kids know that visitation is a priority to you. It is also important to be flexible about traffic, play dates and illness. This will relieve some of the stress of transitions for your children.

Make visitation time parenting time. Resist the impulse to be a Disneyland Dad (or mom) by cramming your kids' time full of treats, outings and special events. Don't over-schedule your children. Your kids need time to just be with you and to talk with you while you can really listen. Kids respond to rules and responsibility, and it makes your space feel more like home.

Make your home their home. Get to know your neighbors and help your children make friends. Set a loose schedule so your children know what to expect. Use checklists, or separate sets of clothes and toiletries, to make sure they have what they need in both places they live.

Make age-appropriate schedules. Toddlers and teenagers have different needs. Do the research and make sure your visitation schedule or parenting plan is meeting the emotional needs of your child's current developmental stage.

Include extended family. Try to fit in visits to grandparents and other extended family so your child stays in touch.

Respect your former spouse. Let your former spouse know about changes in your schedule and travel plans or if a new babysitter or romantic interest will be with your kids while they are with you. Communicate where you will be while you have the children and decide together how emergencies should be handled.

DON'T:

Don't equate money with love. Encourage and facilitate your children's time with the other parent. It should never be about whether child support has been paid. That can make your kids feel like they are worth exactly as much as the support you receive.

Don't let divorce emotions spill out during visitation transitions. Don't fight with your former spouse in front of the children. Don't use guilt or try to make your kids feel bad about enjoying being with their other parent. Make every effort to be polite to each other when the kids are around or when they can hear you.

Don't make your kids arrange their own visitation. Setting schedules is an adult responsibility that you need to do for your children.

Don't make the kids into emotional mules. Don't ask your kids to carry messages to your ex, don't ask them to spy and don't subject them to the third degree about every detail of time spent away with the other parent. The more they are able to enjoy their time as kids, with few adult worries, the better.

Don't take your child's side in disagreements with the other parent. Let your children know they need to resolve problems with their other parent independently and don't let them pull you into the middle of a dispute — unless you believe they are in danger or you have serious concerns.

Don't allow your child to manipulate visitation. Unless your child is under five, he or she must understand that visitation is not optional. Children under five are often resistant to visitation switches and need extra patience. At any age, if visitation resistance persists, the parents should seek professional help to address the issue.

Don't feel like you have to handle it all yourself. An experienced family law attorney at Jonathan D. Katz in New Paltz, New York, has the knowledge to help you reach a resolution of your custody and visitation legal issues.

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Elizabeth

Upon interviewing Jonathan Katz, I decided to retain him because I was impressed with his approach to divorce: he advocated communication, conflict reduction, and efficiency, toward reducing the stress and monetary expense already inherent to any legal action.

When my case took unexpected turns, Jonathan was agile and effective in his response, even when the straightforward divorce turned into an international custody battle that went to federal court. Responsive at every turn, efficient, and wise in his counsel, Mr. Katz's legal services gave me real value for my investment.

Elizabeth A. Ledkovsky

Diane

Being a single mom, I had enough stress in my life. I had no idea how to go about protecting my self. My daughters were my priority. Jon walked me through the process. He turned a difficult time into a workable solution.

Diane Chiriani

John

Jon's integrity towards his clients is what makes him a standout attorney. He makes it a priority to know whats important to you. You're not just a number. He is up front with you right from the start. He will not string you along just for his financial benefit. He is only willing to settle the case if thats truly what you want. Anytime I called him I received a call back from him that day. Not someone else in the office. He is an attorney that has a passion for whats important to his clients.

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